I want to throw up !

everytime i look at myself I want to throw up, up, UP.. FUCK . i bought all this calorie wise food. and I was doing alright, and im going to the gym but I hate hate hate myself so much . fuck. i just feel like crying, and just smashing every mirror in my room . I'm disgusting. I started my day off with a small green apple (72cals), and then I had my cookie thinsations (1oocals), but then the soup that i have been wating for a month was for lunch today and I had to get some I couldnt stop myself. Im such a fail. FUCK. it was potatoe and cheese (im gunna say 300cals) no salt or anything and I don't eat bacon, So i didnt eat any of the bacon bits. and then I came home and stuffed my fatass face. I came home and had Jello (100cals), a slice of cheese bread (200) and I stuffed my face with cake . cause Im making a cake for my friends birhday tomorrow and I just stuffed my face with the left over peices! EFF. like 5000000calories . HATE MYSELF. I NEED CONTROL SO BAD. EFF.

i'm going to the gym and im going to push myself till i throw up!
throw it all up!